A Holiday Boost for the Helpers Who Feel Like They’re Doing It All

By Noelle Rizzio, PEL, LCPC

If you’re heading into this holiday season already tired, this is for you.

This time of year has a way of putting helpers into overdrive. Counselors, educators, caregivers, moms, leaders—the ones everyone else leans on. You’re holding space at work, showing up at home, remembering the details, managing the emotions, and quietly making sure everything doesn’t fall apart. And somewhere along the way, your own needs get pushed to the bottom of the list.

If you’re feeling stretched thin, overwhelmed, or secretly counting down the days until January… you’re not failing. You’re human.

When Being the Strong One Gets Heavy

Helpers are really good at functioning. We’re trained to stay calm, be supportive, and keep things moving—even when we’re exhausted. But the holidays add extra layers: expectations, family dynamics, financial pressure, grief, comparison, and the unspoken belief that we should feel more joy than we actually do.

Here’s the truth we don’t say out loud enough: Just because you can do it all doesn’t mean you should.

Strength isn’t measured by how much you carry. It’s measured by how well you care for yourself while you’re carrying it.

You Don’t Need a Breakdown to Deserve a Break

Many helpers wait until they’re completely depleted before giving themselves permission to rest. We tell ourselves:

• “I’ll slow down after the holidays.”

• “Other people have it worse.”

• “I just need to push through a little longer.”

But burnout doesn’t announce itself politely. It shows up as irritability, numbness, resentment, exhaustion, or the quiet thought of I don’t even recognize myself right now.

This season, what if relief didn’t require a breaking point?

Small Shifts That Make the Season Lighter

This isn’t about adding more self-care to your to-do list. It’s about releasing some of the pressure you were never meant to carry in the first place.

1. Lower the bar—on purpose.
Good enough really is good enough. Every tradition does not need to be magical. Every moment does not need to be meaningful. You’re allowed to choose ease.

2. Say no without a speech.
You don’t owe long explanations for protecting your energy. A simple “That doesn’t work for me this year” is enough.

3. Let yourself be supported.
Helpers struggle to receive. This season, practice allowing—allowing help, understanding, flexibility, and grace.

4. Anchor back into your worth.
Your value is not based on productivity, generosity, or how much you give. You matter even when you rest.

A Gentle Reminder as the Year Closes

You’ve made it through a lot this year—things you don’t always talk about, moments you powered through, people you showed up for when it was hard to show up for yourself.

If the holidays feel heavy, you’re not alone. And if joy feels complicated, that doesn’t mean it’s absent—it may just look quieter this year.

As we move toward the new year, you don’t need to reinvent yourself. You don’t need big resolutions or dramatic change. Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is pause, breathe, and choose yourself—just a little more often.

You deserve rest. You deserve support. And you deserve a season that doesn’t require you to sacrifice yourself to get through it.

This is your permission slip to take care of the helper behind the help.

You’re doing more than enough.

Happy Holidays!